Journaling Through Grief
Grieving the loss of a loved one is often a lonely place.
The trajectory and timeline of your grief journey is individual, and may not match the emotion, feelings and grief stages that fellow bereaved family members and friends experience along the way. Journaling in the aftermath of a loss has proven to be beneficial to the bereaved as they process their grief.
Whether you lost a child, a parent, a sibling, a spouse, or anyone you loved, journaling can be helpful as you move forward. The process of getting your thoughts, feelings, sadness and grief written down is a good tool to assist you on your grief journey.
There is no correct way to journal about grief.
Some people prefer to type on a computer while others prefer to hand write on paper in a notebook or journal. Choose the way that feels right to you. If you chose to write in a paper journal, you may want to put thought into purchasing a certain journal that you feel would honor your entries: your words to or about your loved one. You may want to purchase a journal with a cover that reflects the somberness of your feelings, or a cover that will bring you comfort as you write to celebrate the life of your loved one. Note the texture of the cover and paper you will be writing on. A thoughtful selection of your writing implement may also have special meaning. If you can, indulge yourself in shopping for a journal and thoughtfully choosing a journal that honors your loved one. It does not need to be expensive, and a plain notebook can work just as well.
How to Get Started
Once you are ready to write (or type), start writing. Brainstorming words that are in your heart and on your mind is often a good way to start. You can explore those feelings and let complete thoughts and whole sentences come later. Below are some examples that might feel true to you at this time:
Consider writing a letter
If you have difficulty getting started, you may want to start by writing about your day as if you are having a conversation. What would you tell your person? Here’s an example:
Or, give your entry a title
For example, “Our Last Conversation” or “Saying Goodbye.” Whatever gets your thoughts and feelings described is what matters. Just keep writing.
Empty yourself of everything you want and need to say.
When should you journal?
Some people prefer to start the day with a journal entry, while others prefer around bedtime. Write as often as you wish. Consider making it a ritual by including some of the tips below. You will eventually be drawn to journaling as you begin to feel the benefit of it.
Bonus Tips
Put on some calming music and/or light a candle. If desired, Youtube videos of calming and healing sounds are available to set as your backdrop. For additional tips, prompts, and ideas, click here for a great resource.
Journaling will allow you to connect with your loved one AND your feelings.
If you haven't already started a journal, give it a try. We highly recommend it. If you have a good suggestion, we would love to hear it as it may support someone else who is grieving. Please send it to us at info@raiseyourhearts.org.
